Clara and the Glass Elevator

I had a rather exciting day yesterday. (I don't wanna say I had a 'DAMN FUCKING EXCITING' day because some annoying 'cool' people might be like, 'Ugh! Clara thinks her day is exciting? She must be such a loser! How can she think being trapped in a lift that's about to crash (from the 17th storey) because the wires/cords/whatever-you-call-it were very worn, with no air, no lights, two smelly boys and a girl with big titties (LEE-ANN GOH) for seven point five hours be classified as 'exciting'?'

Yepps. I'm serious. That was what happened to me. Please read on.

I had my last exam (Public Law and Regulations Code: LLAW 1102, because you needed to know that) at 8:45am yesterday morning. Woke up at 7am, man! That's uber early for me. Before I go on, I would like to say thank you to Song, Sam, Michelle and Rebecca for giving me a wake up call for my Torts Exam and Song, Kate and Eeling's mom (haha!) for my PubLaw exam.

Exam ended at 10:30am. As if they chopped the exam time by half an hour! I hope I did okay =S *touch wood on Kate's head* After the exam, Kate dropped me home. She is a very good manual driver who 'parks brilliantly'. HAHA. (Don't get angry, Kate! You know I love ya!)

(Haha, I'm dragging on my got-stuck-in-a-lift-that's-about-to-crash story to get you curious and hyped up about it.)

After that, I went over to Song's (mass scummy) house to help him clean windows. I'm the best window cleaner there is (I charge $ 43.76/hour in case you're interested)! I played The Sims while he studied (he has two more exams! Wahaha!). Went home around 5pm.

(I'm dragging on and on and on and on...Excited enough to piss in your panties yet?)

I had dinner with my Law bummies and more at Ming's Palace. (Thanks to Jacqui, the wonderful social planner!) It was fun. Everyone (well, people on my table anyways. The people on the other table had their own wonderful convos I'm sure) was great and so funny to talk to! We ate peking duck pancakes! YUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM. We (especially me and EeLing hahaha) took lotsa coughs*cool*coughs photos. Mish, send them to me please! Dinner ended pretty early, around ten something, so I called LeeAnn to see if she wanted to catch up.

(Hahaha. Are you bored? Don't be lah! Be patient...)

LeeAnn picked me up in her hot sexy Honda Prelude (yes, I'm serious. She drives a Honda Prelude. That's how much of a man she is. HAHA). She had these two other guys with her (Joe and Kainan). No wonder the car smells of threesome sex. He flirted with LeeAnn heaps (LeeAnn, don't shoot me for saying this. That was what I saw).

We went for coffee at Palazzo Cafe. Vienna chocolate was yummy ass. I don't think Joe likes me very much. Must be my annoyingness-sarcastic streak. I mean, sometimes you can just feel that you're not liked very much.
Haha, anyways. Like I care. The other dude and some Indian guy who dropped by were very nice indeed.

(Okay okay, the lift part is next...)

After coffee, we drove to some apartment so that Joe could collect some stuff. We got in a little elevator. Joe and Kainan, being COMPLETE FUCKING IDIOTS, jumped and shooked the lift vigorously. We got up to the third floor (we were supposed to stop at the seventh floor) and all of a sudden, the lift stopped. It didn't just stop, it actually stopped SCARILY. Made me get butterflies and all.

Fine fine. I was exagerating a LITTLE about it being on the 17th floor and all. The lift was air-conditioned and well-lit. But the big titties part was true.

So yes. Me, LeeAnn and two smelly boys were stuck in the lift. There was a sign that says 'Press the bell for 5 seconds and wait for a reply'. We pressed the bell for around 10 minutes (120 times longer than we were meant to). No one came. Argh. I was so scared.

I thought of:

1. Charlie and the Glass Elevator. I was afraid the lift was going to shoot out into space.
2. Mr and Mrs Smith. I was afraid a bomb was planted in the lift and that someone wants me dead. Actually, come to think about it, perhaps someone wanted one of the boys dead.
3. Final destination. I was afraid that when I get out of the lift, the door would close on my head/hair and get chopped off.
4. Some other movie. I was afraid the cable holding up the lift would break. And you can imagine what that would do.

After fifteen minutes (hahaha, not seven point five hours), two people came (not the security people). They told us how to open the lift doors from the inside. When we got the door to open, I realized the lift was stuck in between the second and the third floor. Haha. It was freaky. Two hot buff men (YEAAAAA) helped me down.

Well yes. That was my oh-so-exciting lift experience. But hey I was scared. The incident created fear in me (imminent). Hahaha. Speaking of law terms, I can actually sue the City East Apartment security for false imprisonment (Trespass). False imprisonment is a direct act by the defendant that totally the plaintiff of his/her liberty without lawful justification. (Cite: Bird v Jones) We were trapped in there for fifteen minutes (instead of five seconds) and no security people came to rescue us. That deprived me of my liberty! Also, it was a total restraint of my liberty as I did not have the knowledge that it was possible to open the lift door from the inside. Hahaha.

Okay I will shutup about Torts Law stuff before someone shoots me.

--------------

I've got a fetish for Kate Hurst dresses. Though, that does not mean they suit me.

These are my picks:





The black version of the yellow ra-ra dress I posted below.



The pink version.



God I love this one.

Lotsa love,

Clara

x o x o

Breathe.........

I'm nervous for my Torts exam tommorow. So, I'm releasing some stress by posting an entry. Hope you don't mind. Hey, why should you mind anyway? It's MY blog!

I was browsing through my pictures folder a few days ago and found these lil dollies! I made them during the summer holidays last year when I had nothing else better to do. Song, you remember those days, didn't you? I can't cite the website I made this from because I lost it.

But anyways, there ya go!















Tell me which one your favourite is! Mine are dolls number two and three!

Lotsa love,

Clara.

x o x o

P/S: SCREAMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*

Here's another for the collection!

Oooooh, another prettyful yellow dress to spice up the collection!



A gorgeous Kate Hurst dress! I WANT I WANT I WANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love my chubby duck: Lenny Shingkenishi!!!!!!!!

This post ain't gonna be like my usual, meaningless, lame posts. Thus, it is typed in green.

I was having a shat in the toilet, thinking of all the MANY things that piss me off. So I'm making a list, hoping that after people read this, the world will be a better place (well, my world anyway).

Things I hate:

1. People who crosses the road extremely slowly as I (a reasonable, prudent driver) am approaching them. Like, hello!??! Can you just fucking stop taking your own sweet time and walk faster?!?! It's not gonna hurt you to do so, in fact it might even save your life (even though it is evident you don't really care about it). I know we, as drivers, must slow down when there's a damn pedestrian crossing, but you are NOT king of the road, as my car is bigger than your puny little body.

2. People who 'act cute' when their photos are being taken. This include doing the peace sign. (I don't mean to offend anyone when I say that. Personally, I HATE it)

3. Oh oh, and you know what's even worse? People who take photos of themselves with the cute lil webcam or digicam AND act cute. ARGHHHHHHHHHH! Ok firstly, don't dress up and put makeup and shit just for the webcam. Secondly, don't make your eyes look bigger and make cute expressions (e.g. pouting, smile cutely, giggle). Thirdly, don't take your photo from a million different angles and pick the best ones to show your other teenybopper friends so they'll see how thin and pretty and cute you look!

Seriously right, your friends (if you have any) know how you look IN PERSON. You don't have to take cute photos to try and convince them that you are not actually ugly. TOO LATE. YOU CAN'T HIDE! Geez. Also, when posting photos, no need to choose the best ones because one day people will see you in person and discover the truth. They'll say something along the lines of 'Omg, without all those photoshopping and airbrushing, she look damn ugly/fat/pimply/ man!'.

Check out my photo below. I look damn retarded here. But then at least I know this is just me and that my friends seen me in person, and know how gorgeous (haha) I look. Thus, I'm not worried about ugly photos.



4. People who says I'm wrong and argue with me (with no good points) just to annoy me. DON'T DO IT.

5. Kim, my ex-job manager. If you know her, shut the fuck up.

6. Pizza Hut. Because they charge extra for dine-in. The cost of trasnfering a pizza onto a plate and then washing if after costs no moer than a disposable pizza box. What the fuck man. I love the Chicken Aloha pizza with BBQ sauce though. No, I am not contradicting myself.

7. People who goes 'Hey Clara, guess what?' really 'excitedly' and then go 'Nah, actually I shouldn't tell you. It's embarassing/a big secret/etc'. Argh, seriously, if you wanna tell me something, don't stop halfway. Curiosity kills Clara. (Actually I did it to Pickles before. Sorry Piks. Haha.)

8. The fact that my hair grows. I'm angry that it's not as cockatooish anymore. Please comfort me.

9. People who calls me a 'fob'. FUCK YOU. 'Fobs' are people who do not know English (very well) and says stuff like 'How is the weather laaaaaaaaaaaaaa?' The fact that I've got a Malaysian accent does not make me a fob. Leave me alone.

10. People (above 15) who screams in disgust when they hear the word 'sex'. Argh. Sex is out there. It happens whether you like it or not. (Look outside. You are bound to hear/see something.) So don't act like some innocent goody-two-shoes. You're not.

11. People who wears eyeliner when they don't know how to and looks like Michael Jackson. It's scary ok! Go read some makeup tutorials.

12. People who says they don't like eating when they're around guys. You know, just to act like all slim and skinny. E.g. 'Oh my god. How can anyone eat KFC. It's like so greasy?! And it like makes you fat and gives you pimples?!?! Ewww gross?!?! I eat salad for breakfast, lunch and dinner!' Ok, there's nothing wrong with eating healthy, but now when you say all those shit and then go home and eat pizza and Maccas, it's wrong. Let me tell you this, bimbo, guys LOVE healthy, nutritious girls that are proud of what they eat.

While I'm at this, for people who are concern about their weight, don't cut down on food. EXERCISE! Or if you're a junkfood addict like me, cut down on chips and chocolates.

13. Hypocrites. People who laughs at my height just because they are 0.00001 mm taller. Pick on someone your own size, buster!

14. People with bad body odour. Hey, did you know that.... it costs only $4 to get a reliable bottle of deodorant? A shower would be nice too. I'm not insulting you, it's for your own hygience and people skills.

15. Blonde asians (the ones that are not naturally born that way, of course).

16. Girls/Women who wear miniskirts and ugg boots in winter (or anytime of the year!). Those two items complement each other like onions and chocolate ice cream (Quote: Simon Cowell). Also, ugg boots are not a good excuse to keep you warm when you're wearing a bloody short skirt. Get some pants!

17. People who say they don't study (when they do) just to sound cool.

18. People who looks down on other people on the basis of their looks. I was at David Jones once after work shopping for LeeAnn's birthday present, and of course I was smelly, greasy and not the most attractive person in the world at that moment. There was this rich, old busty woman, a small-chested, gross-looking me and a sales assistance in the lingerie section. I was less than a metre away from the sales woman. The saggy rich old woman was 5 metres away. The fucking sales woman was like 'Hi, can I help you?' in a rather loud voice. I turned to smile at her, realizing she was talking to the oldie. Fuck you, bitch. I can't be polished and dressed-up 24/7. But hey, at least I've got money to spend and I'm taking it to Myer.

19. Overpriced shops with dodgy stuff. I hate shops like these. E.g. Supre, MCL, MCT, etc. People have the impression that these shops are so cheap because they are dodgy. So, they decided to take advantage of that and jack up their prices. I mean who would actually pay $ 80 for a denim jacket from Supre (I'm serious. I saw a jacket there that costs that much!) when you can go to Myer and get a Bardot denim jacket (not only a better brand, but better quality mind you) for the equivalent price?

Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that we should buy branded items, as I'm not all for brand myself. I go for what's worth my money. The fact that places like Supre have shit stuff and they sell for not what it's worth (they worth a dollar), shits me. Take Valleygirl for example. Yes they do have dodgy stuff, but it's cheap!! You can full buy ok tops for like $5. They know what they're worth. Mom and Dads, don't let your kids buy Supre, it's better to let them run around naked (joke).

I'll end this post on a less angrier note. This is a picture Song drew.



Yes or no? Haha. (It's a Simpson's joke by the way.)

As prettyful as .... Yellow

I'm taking a tiny lil break from studying Torts. And I'm waiting for dinner to be served. Gladys and Abishek! Cook faster la! A hungry man makes an angry man! (I meant man as in 'human', not the male species)

I came across some gorgeous dresses (WHICH I CANNOT AFFORD SO IF YOU ARE A RICH, HANDSOME MAN WITH A LOT OF MONEY TO SPARE, BUY THEM FOR ME!!! ACTUALLY YOU DON'T NEED TO BE HANDSOME, RICH WILL DO. Oh dear...was that subtle enough?) on vogue.com.

They all have one thing in common. They're yellow. (I don't actually like yellow, but these designs are gorgeous) I know some of you annoying people (e.g. Gladys) might be like 'Ugh Clara has bad taste. As if she likes that dress!'. Well just get lost. I've got good taste. Now, you may think 'What IS good taste? There is no such thing as good taste, it's just taste!'. Let me tell you that the definition of good taste is Clara's taste. Yes, yes, I know I'm good at predicting what people will think (because I think that way) haha.

Well anyways, enough with my pre-emptive strike and ON WITH THE DRESSES!









Okay, that's all for now. Gladys calling me for dinner.

I'm getting the hang of it!

Wow...Three posts in one day! So proud of myself *chuckles*.

Wait...It is not loserish to post so many times a day right? Well if it is, I made it cool.

I just wanted to announce to the world (yes, the world because I'm going to be famous) that Song has NO talent whatsoever in drawing (and singing).



Yes. He drew that on msn.. So terrible, right? The message he's trying to convey is 'Clara smells like 'lau sai' (diarrhea) and has a chubby, nutritious face'.

Retard.

The picture that I'm gonna post below, is the BEST PICTURE EVER (drawn using msn) you are gonna come across.



Wow. I mean it's so meaningful, with the 'hug me' and all. So cute, right? Girls (because boys should be banned from drawing), if you draw like that on msn (with my skills), everyone will like you instantly. Seriously.

Before I fly away, I wanna take this opportunity to.... show off my socks collection. I know some idiots will be like 'What you call that a socks collection?!?! Only so few socks!'. Well, I don't care. My socks are nice and clean. And I also got more socks than shown in this picture.



Shit. So damn cool! (Photo taken last year) Whoa, got apple socks man! (Yes, the orange socks are a lil dirty. I don't wash it because dirty socks are good luck. Nah just kidding, I'm not that unhygienic. I don't wash it to keep the vibrance)

Love, the ccoww.

x o x o

Stutters*

Err...Umm...Ahh....Ermm...Sniffs*

Wow, a shiny new blog. I don't know what to say! :'(

I don't have a blogging style to call my own.

I'm no hungry-fat blogger like Gladys.

I'm no cute-sexy blogger like JiaMeei.

I'm no funny-bimbotic blogger like EeLing (jk).

I'm no extremely-clever blogger who uses big words like Kate.

etc.

I'm no blogger. Fullstop.

I shall create my own blogging style then. WAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

...

..................

.... Okay I've got nothing to say. I will post some pictures I drew using MsPaint (only) to prove that I've got talent.

Warning: Some photos contain subliminal messages (not so subliminal anymore!)



I told you I've got talent. JEALOUS?



Shit! Even more talent!



This is a masterpiece, right? Yes.



Gladys took a bite off my bosom-ous apple. Bitch.

That's all for now.

LuBcHuzZzZ ~*!*~*~!~ (All teenyboppers shall die!)

I'm no longer a blog virgin.

This is a rather sad day for me.

I am like everybody else.